Okay. So why does it seem like most mornings I wake up and feel like I have to gather my inner troupes to face the day? Like I need to take a big, deep breath in the morning, run into the whirlwind of the day, and collapse back in bed at night barely remembering what just happened (oh, and throw in a few wake ups through the night too!)
This morning, I woke up refreshed (slightly!), squeezed in some exercise while hubby was still home to watch the kiddies and felt great. My head was clear. I patiently took over from hubby getting our two year old to eat her breakfast. I did repeated planes, trains, dolphins, fish and even a lion spoon to get that food into her mouth! I was so proud of myself, what a good mum! I then cleaned her up (showered, she kind of wore her breakfast) and put my 8 month old to sleep. Good day so far. Big pat on my back.
I got Miss two settled watching a kids show, and then raced around to try and undo the tornado that had seemed to come through every room of our house overnight and that morning [I have GOT to get rid of more stuff!]. Miss two didn't last long... she was soon following me, chattering, 'helping' and pulling out more stuff. God please help me! Miss 8 months woke up next. Teething too I think. . . the rest of my morning is a bit of a blur...crying kids, food messes and spills, children undressing themselves, pains and aches to kiss, sooking, stories to read, favourite toys to find, an attempt at a nutritious breakfast for myself, nappies changed, washing, hubby phone calls, cleaning and then nap times....oh my. I don't think I've covered half of it and I officially think I've lost my sanity for the day!
But, not so.
I am in fact, sane. Because deep down I know that I love this. I know that this is amazing. This is incredible. God picked me to be a mum to these gorgeous, crazy kids. And I love it.
I may not always feel like I'm this super model, super mum. I mightn't always have my schedules right, or meal times down pat. I might mess up, growl and get grumpy. I might sometimes look a little bleary eyed over at someone else who seems to have it together. I mightn't get the couple time with my hubby that I want. Some days will be amazing, some, not as much. But it's okay. I'm choosing to give myself grace today, just as Christ does for me. He loves me as I am. Covered in baby goop, mess and all. And I need to love me too.